PEC Challenge: Wilson Ave Deli

If you grew up in Middletown, NJ, this review may not surprise any of you.  Wilson Ave Deli is your typical bodega, born before the days of a 7-11 on every corner.  The vibe is still about the same.  At least the last "quick service" spot I went to (QuikCheck) had the decency to make their faux PEC's to order via a touch screen.  This spot simply had a heat lamp full of breakfast sandwiches akin to what you'd find in a 7-11.  Look, I'm not here to shit down any place's throat (you all are aware of my affinity for 7-11 taquitos), I'm sure plenty of happy customers have cashed in hundreds of dollars of winnings from scratchies at this place, but if you're going to serve a PEC like this just maybe don't at all.  There are loads of these types of bodegas that I'll get to, dotting the Sandy Hook and Raritan Bays and I'll be interested to see how they all stack up.  They've been there forever, the people who live in the neighborhood likely still utilize these places for milk and cigarettes.  I get it, I appreciate it, I just would never go out of my way to go here when there are literally 50 better PEC options within 5 miles.  With that being said, loyal readers, tomorrow, I will be celebrating Leap Day (and I suppose my birthday) by getting to the Dublin House no later than 12pm to watch Liverpool take on Watford.  This will likely turn into an all-day event of good spirits and a little bit of drinking so if you'd like to meet up with a washed-up 31-year old food blogger, I will be gallivanting the streets of Red Bank all day and you are all invited. 

Bread Rating: 4.3/10 (Pretty much what you'd expect old bread that's been sitting in a heat lamp for 5 hours to be like.  They likely took the rolls that they sell that are about to expire and just use them as their breakfast sandwich rolls.  Honestly haven't tasted bread like that since school lunch at Fairview School.)

Pork Roll Rating: 3.8/10 (This might have not been actual meat, which means I still haven't broken any Lent rules.  Joking aside, there was barely any pork roll on this, two thin slices.)

Egg Rating: 4.4/10 (a Fried egg that was fried hours ago, I mean I guess it could have been much worse.)

Cheese Rating: 5.3/10 (I guess the plus to having your sandwich under a heat lamp for hours is that the cheese will be melted? I'm grasping for positives here.)

Sandwich Composition: 1.5/10 (A shameful display.  No SPK, obviously, because they made this sandwich at 4am and it was sitting under the heat lamp until their first customer not buying cigarettes and coffee (me) came in at 9. Barely any meat, bread that's been sitting out likely for days.)

Overall: 3.7/10 (As someone who's willingly eaten multiple meals from 7-11, who am I really to judge? This just gave me serious roadside 7-11 vibes, from the grab and go, to the general grittiness of the inside of the store.  I mean, there's a Gem's literally 500 feet away from this place so just go there if you're in a pinch.  But yeah, I'd say skip this one unless you're looking for some sort of NJ bodega experience.)

Price: $3.50, cards accepted. 

In a completely WILD turn of events, I saw this place was rated a 4.6/5 on Google Maps which made me literally laugh out loud for three minutes straight.  If you think this place is good, please, come with me to get a PEC, I promise you, there's better out there. 

Wilson Ave Deli is located at 198 Wilson Ave, Port Monmouth, NJ 07758

Taliercio's Challenge: Jersey Boy

No, this sandwich is not about me.  I would never be so vain, especially during Lent.  If I had to take an educated guess, I'd say this is named after the Broadway play Jersey Boys. I don't know just a hunch.  For the uncultured, Jersey Boys is a Tony Award winning musical that dramatizes the formation, success and eventual break-up of the 1960s group The Four Seasons.  The Four Seasons, led by singer Frankie Valli, are one of the best selling musical groups of all time and hail from Newark, New Jersey.  If you ever attended a party of any kind (I'm talking Baptisms to Weddings) in New Jersey between 1960-present, you've probably have heard a few of their songs. (Yes, we have DJs at baptisms sometimes, get over it.) "Oh, What a Night" and "Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You" have been featured in hundreds of films throughout the years and the play was made into a movie in 2014, directed by Clint Eastwood.  Anyway, the story is the classic rags to riches, and then back to rags story that you've seen a hundred times only this time it's about a group of dudes (including Joe Pesci!) from New Jersey so you know it's extra dramatic.  And now that I know what this play is actually about (thanks to my very thorough research for this blog), maybe I'll check out a matinee this weekend.  

Jersey Boy: Salami, Provolone, Broccoli Rabe, Olive Oil

This sandwich made me want to cry tears of joy and not even because these are my favorite ingredients in a sandwich.  I was in Virginia yesterday and ate a sandwich from a place I thought I enjoyed, Market 2 Market.  Only now, I realize that that place absolutely sucks.  Provolone isn't my favorite cheese and I generally wouldn't order broccoli rabe, but the freshness of everything together with salami and olive oil made this sandwich a delight.  Hence the tears of joy.  Sometimes you don't know what you have until it's gone, so I guess the moral of the story is I love living in a place that knows how to make sandwiches.  OK, now that that's out of my system it's time for me to objectively rate this sandwich compared to the rest of Taliercio's.  Salami and provolone aren't my favorites, provolone is sharp and salami can get overbearingly salty after a while;  add in the bitterness of a broccoli rabe and you might have a tough time getting through the whole thing.  Olive oil basically runs through my veins though so I really enjoyed that addition.  If you like all of those ingredients then no doubt, you'll love this sandwich.  The ingredients are fresh, the bread is always good and you're getting your money's worth of meat and cheese.  

Rating: 6.5/10 (which according to my quick conversion math means anything rated 6 and over in New Jersey is a 10/10 in Virginia, and really this could be for rating anything not only sandwiches.)

Anyway here's a live look into my brain while I eat these:

 

PEC Challenge: White House Subs

I turn 21 31 today, I know, hard to believe after last week's dramatics at the doctor's office.  But here I am, now living into my thirties.  How do you celebrate such an occasion?  You go see Celine Dion in Atlantic City.  Other than scream singing her songs at the top of my lungs like the sorority sister I truly am, I wouldn't say I went into this concert the biggest Celine fan.  But when one of the greatest singers in the world is performing in your state (and a group of friends express interest), you have to do it.  Did it matter that I was the only straight male in attendance? No! Celine rocked that shit to the ground with a once in a lifetime performance (that she did for ten straight years of sold out crowds in Vegas, and coming to a coastal city near you).  After the show, we went to the Wild West bar where some random cover band had the unfortunate role of following up the voice of a generation.  Luckily for them, I was already several vodka sodas in by the time I got to them (and successfully executed a Scottie Doesn't Know chant). How do you recover from a weekend like that in Atlantic City?  You guessed it, with a PEC.  Since I'm now an "adult", I'm contractually obligated to stay at the Hard Rock instead of the Tropicana.  Inside the Hard Rock is a bastardized franchise of a timeless AC sandwich shop, White House Subs.  The perfect place to refuel after a late night.  (When I say perfect, I mean only place since lets be real, you aren't venturing off campus to explore the streets of AC with a hangover). I had a handful of friends who had never had a PEC, so I was really hoping this would do the trick.  I guess I'll have to go back to AC to check out the original....

Bread Rating: 6.6/10 (bread was a soft Kaiser roll maybe too soft because it fell apart with all the grease, which we will get to.) 

Pork Roll Rating: 8.2/10 (three greasy pork roll slices which to be honest is what you want after a late night in AC) 

Egg Rating: 7.1/10  (big fluffy egg, a little plain mostly because they don’t apply salt pepper ketchup here, but it was definitely enhanced by the cheese within the egg.)

Cheese Rating: 7.7/10 (white American cheese for the win. It stretched its way to my heart giving me the hangover relief I desperately needed)

Sandwich Composition: 6.3/10 (heavy on the egg. Maybe a little light on the pork roll. No SPK. Bread really fell apart.)

Overall: 7.1/10 (Exactly what you would expect when you take a landmark food destination and franchise it inside a casino. It did the job.) 

Price: $8

Hard Rock Hotel is located at 1000 Boardwalk, Atlantic City, 08401

Taliercio's Challenge: The Hammer

I had my first physical in four years today. What a shitty experience. I mean no one hates doctor's offices more than me I can guarantee that.  I'm someone who nears mental collapse at the thought of blood work so I'm sure you understand but let me explain for a minute.  First off, they make you sit in a waiting room for 30+ minutes where the only things you have to listen to are your brain and Wendy Williams (tbh my brain might be worse). Then they bring you in to make you wait some more while you think about all the ways you are slowly dying.  When the doctor arrives you are a sweaty mess of anxiety that I’m sure doesn’t affect your vitals at all but sure the Vodka Red Bull’s I drank 5 years ago last week is the problem. Finally (and this is the worst part) they unnaturally remove blood from your body which always makes me want to die. This time they removed two vials (more than usual, I think I don't know I like to block out traumatic events) which took roughly one minute (that felt like an entire year) of me nearly whimpering like the baby back bitch I really am.  Tattoo, no problem.  Taking blood out of my body and you get to witness a full-blown anxiety attack.  Despite likely being the butt of every nurse's joke today (not the first time), overall a great experience. 10/10 every time. This is why I always wait for a Presidential Election year to do this because why not make the year as insufferable as possible? Hopefully, I’m still alive when Elon Musk figures out how to put a health chip in every person so doctors can just take your readings remotely. Elon, if you’re reading this please figure this out.  Some free advice for healthcare professionals in the crowd. Want to make this experience better? Meet me in a place where I’m comfortable. Oh, I don’t know like a bar. Order me a beer and then grill me about my health. That’s the only way you’ll get any real answers.  Or just follow this blog. Either works for me, anything to cease this awful process. And for anyone who cares (Mom), my blood pressure is normal and I've lost five pounds.  Speaking of pounds, here's Taliercio's panini named The Hammer. 

The Hammer: Ham, Asiago Cheese, Spinach, Tomato, Red Onion, Honey Mustard 

Nothing says "I value my health" more than eating a mountain of Black Forest Ham following a blood exam.  I figured with the Asiago cheese (they offer it at Panera Bread which automatically makes me think it's healthy) and spinach, this could be my last shot at a "healthy" sandwich from Taliercio's while my doctor's words still ring in my ears.  Well, let's address the asiago cheese.  I knew it was going to be an issue from the minute it got in my car.  This cheese is pungent! It overpowered the entire panini with its smell and taste, not even the honey mustard could save it.  So no, I didn't love this panini, not even a little bit (I still ate it) but after my morning there was only one direction to go and that's up.  Then again, I am going to the Devils game tonight so I'm not outside the realm of getting hit with a trifecta of harrowing events in one day after they inevitably blow a 3-0 lead with me in the building.

Overall: 4.6/10  

Taliercio's Challenge: The Bean Town

I spent the week in Massachusetts last week to celebrate the birth of my girlfriend's nephew, David (welcome to the world and to your blog debut!).  As per tradition on my trips to Massachusetts, I always make sure to get a roast beef sandwich.  Why? Because roast beef sandwiches have been a specialty of the Boston area since the 1950s (my girlfriend grew up there and had no idea this was a thing, luckily for her, she's living with the world's premier sandwich blogger*). Kelly's Roast Beef in Revere claims to have invented the sandwich in 1951, which includes white American cheese, mayo, and optional horseradish sauce (always, and I can't stress this enough, take the horseradish sauce). So, did Taliercio's put any of those ingredients into their Bean Town grilled cheese? NO! Because if regional rivalries serve me right, we would never emulate exactly what goes on a sandwich.  Sure, there's roast beef (Taliercio's roast beef=heaven) but that's all there is in common with a Kelly's Roast Beef sandwich.  The white American cheese is replaced by Mozzarella and Cheddar, and the horseradish sauce is replaced by a distant cousin, Russian Dressing.  Does it stack up? I investigate. 

Bean Town: Roast Beef, Cheddar, Mozzarella, Russian Dressing

This was different than any of the roast beef sandwiches I had in Massachusetts.  Off the bat, they aren't "grilled cheeses" there, the sandwiches there are served cold.  Since this is a grilled cheese there are two melted kinds of cheese on this one, mozzarella and cheddar which to me was a strange blend to me.  The roast beef is always a standout meat at Taliercio's and it was no different in the "grilled cheese" form as the panini form.  Like the White Russian, Russian dressing isn't Russian, in fact, in Germany, it's called American dressing.  Its first appearance was in 1910 in Nashua, New Hampshire, and is the key dressing in a Reuben sandwich.  As far as authenticity goes, the roast beef is generally sliced thinner in Massachusetts and served on an onion roll so I'm going to go towards this being just like the rest of the "traveling grilled cheese sandwiches." I have to give the Boston roast beef the edge here.   

Overall: 7.6/10 

*Unconfirmed

PEC Challenge: Joe's Bagel and Grill

Last Valentine's Day, I told you all the riveting tale of Al Capone and the St. Valentine's Day Massacre.  But I'm not going to bring you down for this year's Valentine's Day.  Why would I do that? I'm just happy this is the last of the winter "holidays" where we all pretend we're happy about the fact that it's thirty degrees outside while force-feeding ourselves decadent dinners.  Call me crazy but I'm more of an "outside with a drink in my hand" holiday guy.  St Patrick's Day? Beer and outside.  Cinco de Mayo? Tequila and outside.  You get the point.  That doesn't mean I don't have any plans tonight.  I'm not an animal.  After reading an article about the top ten romantic dinner spots in NJ, I noticed one was right down the road in Long Branch.  Is it also a place I used to valet cars during summers between college semesters? Yes.  But in my humble opinion, nothing says "romance" more than the thought of me at twenty years old driving a car 1,000 times my net worth. Also, I treated my girlfriend to an everything bagel this morning so who says chivalry is dead? 

Bread Rating: 6.8/10 (Average bagel, maybe a bit too bready, some good toast on the outside.)

Pork Roll Rating: 6.6/10 (Three, kind of, thick slices, the brand they use tasted a bit like bologna which was a little weird.  Unsure if they used the same griddle as the eggs but it didn't seem that way.)

Egg Rating: 6.9/10 (Two fried eggs with melted cheese in between.  Nothing really to write home about, the eggs were average, glad they used two though.)

Cheese Rating: 6.9/10 (Standard yellow American although I appreciated the amount and that it was very melted.  A surprise piece in between pork roll pieces 2 and 3 was nice.)

Sandwich Composition: 6.6/10 (A bit heavy on the ketchup, some runny cheese which isn't necessarily a complaint just something to be aware of.)

Overall Rating: 6.7/10 (Average is about all I could surmise from this PEC.  Nothing about it blew me away, the pork roll was a little unique.  Bagels, decent.  A nice little spot near Monmouth Racetrack.  I can't wait for Spring.)

Price: $5.50, cards accepted. (They have square, which is exceptionally modern for a bagel place around here.)


Joe's Bagel and Grill is located at 205 NJ-36, West Long Branch, NJ 07764

PEC Challenge: QuickChek

I know what you're thinking.  Convenience store pork roll? From QuickChek? I will not leave any stone unturned.  That's my promise to you.  For those reading outside of New Jersey with confusion, QuickChek was my first convenience store experience.  Way before I was doing taquitos from Seven-Eleven (shoutout Bobbert, my Shirlington, VA taquito dealer) or getting kicked out of the Red Bank Wawa, I was going to QuickChek on Bergenline Ave.  I'm not a coffee drinker but I do know sandwiches and the custom touchscreen sandwiches from QuickChek are much better than the "hoagies" from Wawa, sorry.  So when I stumbled into my first QuickChek in a while (grabbing some snacks on my way to Mountain Creek for some snowboarding), I was surprised to see pork roll as an option for a breakfast sandwich.  I suppose this is Jersey after all but generally, these regional chains would only keep with the basic sausage/bacon egg and cheese.   I wanted to say "national" chain there but upon further research, it looks like QuickChek's are only in the New York metropolitan area, starting in Dunellen, NJ in 1967.  The more you know.  OK, enough about convenience stores, how does it stack up?  About how you would expect a convenience store to do.  You're here for utility, not quality, but I'm not going to lie, this surprised me a little.  In fact, the buttered roll from QuickChek was considered in NJ.com's "64 NJ Defining Foods and Where to Find Them" article. 

Bread Rating: 6.7/10 (You know the roll wasn't half bad so maybe good ol' Pete was onto something by including the buttered roll from here.)

Pork Roll Rating: 5.6/10 (The meats were heated by microwave which my elitist brain is telling me is a red flag and should penalize it.  But I also have a history of eating at convenience stores so who am I to really judge? Anyway, the pork roll reminded me of some other spots out of state that didn't really know how to handle our beloved breakfast meat.)

Egg Rating: 5.8/10 (One of those egg patty things you get at places like McDonald's, again not hating on it, just informing you.  This was a little better than what you'd find, but still, one of that imitation insta-egg things vegans probably eat. Again, nothing wrong with it.)   

Cheese Rating: 7.2/10 (Bet you weren't expecting some white American cheese.  I know I wasn't and honestly it brought together the sandwich in a nice way.)

Sandwich Composition: 6.2/10 (For being a microwaved, quick sandwich you pick up and go from a convenience store, this wasn't half bad.  The SPK ratio was actually good, and the sandwich kept together nicely for the most part.)

Overall: 6.3/10 (I know it seems like I actually enjoyed this sandwich, and I actually did, but I have to keep some sort of integrity in my life and this sandwich is what it is.  The moral here is, this could have been a lot worse and it wasn't half bad.  If you run a deli or bagel shop though and you score lower than this, you should just close your business because QuickChek put this all together in about 5 minutes.) 

Price: $4

You can find QuickChek's all over New Jersey but this one was located at 1268 NJ-23, Butler, NJ 07405.  

PEC Challenge: Bagel Guys Deli

Note: I was without my car last week and am in Boston this week so, unfortunately, no Taliercio's sandwiches again.  Luckily for you, I have a couple of PEC's in the bank for this week.  #Content

You know who would hate this blog with the utmost passion? Joaquin Phoenix.  In case you missed it, the 92nd annual Hollywood adoration-fest was last night, where Joaquin took home Best Actor for his portrayal of mentally unstable Arthur Fleck in Joker.  I've always been a fan of Joaquin's work and the win this year is more than deserved. But we're not here to talk about acting, we're here to talk about food.  During his acceptance speech, he went on to describe the horrors and burdens humans have by sitting atop the food chain.  Oh, you like meat? How about cheese? Well, guess what, murderer, Joaquin is here for species equality.  He listed pretty much every ingredient you find in a pork roll, egg, and cheese as the reason we are all ruining the world.  A total buzzkill as I laid on the couch thinking about how I was about to write about my favorite breakfast sandwich tomorrow.  The good news? Joaquin isn't going to cancel my blog.  Because he also came out against canceling people.  So, in a move of solidarity, I will vow on this blog, that whenever I try every single pork roll, egg, and cheese in the world, I will join him in veganism.  I know Joaquin will be waiting patiently to accept me back into the tribe with open arms.  But until then, I will continue to order slices of a slaughtered pig, cooked eggs stolen from a chicken coup, and cheese taken from the milk of cows all around the Tri-State area.  A trifecta of sin.  Sorry, I'm not sorry.  I'm sure my boy Bong Joon Ho isn't nursing his hangover today with a kale salad, and neither should you.  

Bread Rating: 6.8/10 (Fairly average bagel, had some good toast on the outside.)

Pork Roll Rating: 7.4/10 (Thin slices piled high, good job with the griddle, not too overheated. Average tasting pork roll.)

Egg Rating: 6.6/10 (A thin fried egg, was it there I don't know, pork roll is the star here.)

Cheese Rating: 6.7/10 (Regular American yellow on the egg, nothing too memorable.)

Sandwich Composition: 7.2/10 (They did a good job with the composition here especially since it was on a bagel.  SPK ratio was spot on and they really made the pork roll the focus of the sandwich.)

Overall: 6.9/10 (A solid, college spot for a PEC for Monmouth University students nearby.  I really loved the laid back vibe inside, which is what you want when you are across the street from the beach.)

Price: $6, credit cards are accepted.

Bagel Guys Deli is located at 55 Brighton Ave, Long Branch, NJ 07740

PEC Challenge: Marta's Deli

What a game last night.  I bet you were expecting me to lead with a comment about the halftime show, but I would never.  Watching two beautiful Hispanic women over 40 dance for 15 minutes? Not for me.  I'm here for the love and respect of the great American sport of football.  (Several friends recorded the reactions of their sons while watching the halftime show, which was hilarious.) All in all, it was an entertaining game.  No, I had absolutely 0 care in the world who won and thanks to the joys of the internet most of the commercials were already on YouTube by the time they reached their ~$5 MILLION reserved airtime.  But in the end, I was happy with the result. Andy Reid, one of the more likable coaches in the league finally won the big one, while Kyle Shanahan presided over another 4th quarter collapse.  Hey, at least he didn't beat his own record of blowing a 28-3 lead, this time he only blew a 20-10 lead with six minutes remaining.  Who am I really happy for? My buddy, Will.  You see, Will had the box numbers of 0 (SF) and 4 (KC) set to hit perfectly for a large 4th quarter payout.  That's before tragedy struck with a minute remaining when KC scored their game-sealing TD to make the score 31-20.  Morale was low for Will as the touchdown didn't need to happen, all KC needed to do was run down the clock.  That was until a palindrome miracle happened. (If you didn't know, yesterday was the only palindrome day of the century, so pretty rare.)  He unknowingly also had the numbers 0 and 1 which led to an even bigger payout than the first.  Only in America.  And with that, we are onto the 2nd coming of Vince McMahon's "alternative" football league, THIS. IS. THE XFL.  I will be in attendance this Sunday when the New York Guardians open up against the Tampa Bay Vipers because a) I love witnessing history, and b) the league is likely going to fold by March and this might be my only opportunity for live XFL action.  

Bread Rating: 7.6/10 (A toasted kaiser roll fresh out of the toaster oven. Good sized roll=lots of room for contents)

Pork Roll Rating: 7.8/10 (Thin slices of pork roll packed in between two eggs.  I love this technique as it spreads the tastes out on the sandwich rather than having just pork roll or just egg bites, you get a little of both in each.  The pork roll itself was heated perfectly on the griddle which also makes cheesesteaks and quesadillas which only add to the flavor of the total product)

Egg Rating: 7.2/10 (Two fried eggs flanking the pork roll but had a little bit of a tough time scoping out the flavor because of the ketchup. More on that to come.)

Cheese Rating: 7.1/10 (Average yellow American cheese you'd find at most delis.  Putting the cheese in between the eggs and the pork roll is just a veteran move to ensure it actually melts.  Too many places just put it on top of the sandwich and call it a day.)

Sandwich Composition: 7.3/10 (I feel like I've really only talked about the composition which had good and bad.  The setup was well done, with the egg, cheese, good portion of pork roll, cheese and egg, however, there was a bit too much ketchup on this one and as a consequence, the meats were sliding a bit.)

Overall: 7.4/10 (This was a solid PEC, and one you wouldn't necessarily expect to find in a deli that really caters to lunch with their cheesesteaks and pizza (in addition to a few Mexican dishes).  Like most establishments on Red Bank's West Side, this is another hidden treasure on a street most people use as a throughway, Shrewsbury Ave.  

Price: $6

Marta's Deli is located at 124 Shrewsbury Ave, Red Bank, NJ 07701